It was at a gathering of friends from my church. We met to plan the next YAG season at a restaurant a few steps down the road from my house. Nice night, two-for-one pizzas, outdoor smell of mosquito repellant and summer, and four women around a table.
After the planning and decision-making we ate and relaxed and the topic came up. Very flip, in response to something decisive (perhaps aggressive, I don’t remember) that had somehow slipped out of my mouth, the seniormost of us turns to me and says “Girl, the man for you God hasn’t finished making yet. He’s gonna have to be stroooong.”
“Oh yes Bushy… he must be going through some hardship right now where God is toughening him up for you,” was the chime of another.
“Girl, you need to pray for him. He’s somewhere difficult right now where God is preparing him. Dodging bullets in Iraq or something.”
At the time I sputtered out a surprised laugh. But… REALLY?!
The thought has stuck with me over the course of the past few days and I really don’t know what to think or feel about it. Is it true? Am I ok with that? Am I hard work? Does it mean something is wrong with me? Or right with me? What kind of strength is it he would need? What do I demand? Is it unreasonable? Is it a demand? Or is it just my presence?
And if it is true, where is he now? What does he need? Is he really dodging bullets in Iraq? Or fighting tigers on the Indian Sub-continent? Or drilling wells in hostile territory in Africa? Is he hungry? Is he hurt? Is he sick?
And I stop myself. What the hell am I doing dwelling on something said so casually and meant to be light-hearted and funny?
Something is different. Could it be that I’ve become this sensitive?