I know I know it’s been WEEKS! It isn’t like me to miss a few days much less this many! But I have a reasonable excuse. 14 hour days and Saturdays in the office are my excuse. And I know it’s insane but it is for a time and for a purpose. I’m tired, I dream about work, my laundry needs to be picked up from the cleaners, my shoes need to go to the cobblers, I need to make a dentist appointment and take the garbage out and I just can’t get around to doing it.
The answer to all this is a husband. I think I need one. A big strong man who can take care of me and do the things that I don’t have time to do. So that when I collapse into his arms at 9 o’clock he can say “honey I paid the bills today and went to the cleaners and I’m taking you to the dentist and the dogs have been fed and you can just lie here and be my woman right now.”
Now the idea was presented to one of my near and dear who suggested that, Bushy, what if he’s as busy as you are? Then the conversation will go a lot more like this: “honey I got my PA to pay the bills today, there’s dinner in the kitchen and the housekeeper went to the cleaners and I’m taking you to the dentist in the morning, there’s a new Fendi bag on the counter that you’ve been wanting for weeks and the housekeeper fed and bathed and groomed the dogs and I’ve paid for it all so you can just lie here and be my woman right now.”
Another friend of mine heard this one out and made another valid suggestion. What I really need is a wife.